We Train Others To Devalue Us
As the title suggests, we actually train others to devalue us. How do we do that? Here is what I have found.
We train others to devalue us by:
- Not knowing why we’re here – Failing to know our purpose
- Not taking responsibility for why we’re here
- Not valuing others.
Knowing Our Purpose
Knowing your purpose, gives hope, meaning and life. I have seen so many grasp their value and begin to live into it with passion. This clarity of purpose and passion transforms lives, including your own.
Before I got clear on why I was here, I wondered how I could end up in situations where I was devalued. I would blame others for me being devalued. Then one day it hit me. I was sitting in a job, hating it, feeling so under valued and disrespected. I realized, I had allowed it to happen. I had been unclear on my purpose when I interviewed for the job. So, I ended up, with a job that is full of things I can do, instead of what I am here to do. We all have things we can do, but the key is to do what we are here to do.
Whatever it takes to live out your purpose, you have the ability to do those things. It’s how it works. I realized, that along the way, I also picked up skills that I was using just to survive. I realized that I had come to rely on these skills. In fact I rely on them to the point that I was trying to gain recognition for them. These are things I can do that I don’t like to do. I am not saying we will never have to do things that we don’t like to do. That is unrealistic and irresponsible. I have never met a parent that likes to change diapers. With seven children, I have changed a lot. I realized that although all these skills have value, I was using them to stay busy. What I needed to do was to stay purposeful.
This realization led me to dig deep into what I was then responsible for. Knowing my purpose, shone a bright light into that for me.
As I continue to help you realize your purpose, I see how I have given away my responsibility. I called it delegation.
Now I aim to collaborate. This encourages me to give my part, knowing I am part of a bigger picture. This has allowed me to stop delegating my responsibility.
As we give our responsibility away two things happen.
Others know it and they begin to distrust us. We don’t trust others when they delegate their responsibility. And others don’t trust us when we do the same.
It’s simple. If we don’t know our value, we can not value others and their contribution. We value others by serving them where they need it most.
This is what I have seen in my own life and in the lives of those I serve. What has been your experience? How have you trained others to devalue you?
- Do you know why you’re here?
- Do you know what you are responsible for in that?
- Do you know why those around you are here?
We are all held responsible for the reason we are here. Those you lead expect you to know your purpose. They expect you to be clear on your vision, mission and the right tools to help you realize it all. And they need you to collaborate with them as you realize it.
Don’t be fooled into thinking that you can avoid your responsibility of purpose. Those around you know when you do it and you lose trust as the leader you’re meant to be.
Where do you want to be valued? Start there. Feel free to comment below or join the conversation on Facebook